Daily Chicken Joke

Why did the chicken buy a new table for his kitchen?

- His old one got destroyed when his house burned down.

Why did the chicken watch Tron?

- He was horny.  Oh I meant “Porn” not “Tron”.  Eh, works either way.

Why did the chicken flush a copy of USA Today down the toilet?

- His son was working on Plumbing Meritbadge and he needed to unclog a pipe.  Also it was a copy of USA Today.

What did the chicken say when his son asked him to read “Good Night, Moon” for a bed time story?

- Read it yourself you illiterate bastard!

Why was the chicken full of shit?

- He claimed he could tell the difference between the different colored Froot Loops.

Why did the chicken bark like a dog?

- He was hypnotized.

Why did the chicken like peanut butter?

- It was nice that peanut butter took some of the salmonella heat away from chickens.

Why did the chicken recieve 3.2 million dollars from the United States government?

- It was his reward for punching Tyra Banks in the face.

Why did the chicken ride his Segway to the supermarket?

- He was a douchbag who needed some eggs and milk.

How was the chicken evil?

- After reading yesterdays chicken joke you went around all day with “Umbrella” stuck in your head.